I think I'm in denial.
I remember when Joshua was a Senior. I was worried and stressed and wondering what the future was going to hold for him after graduation.
With Holly and Logan, it was ACT scores, grade points and class rankings...and where were they going to go to college?
And now there is Clark. And he is a Senior.
Last weekend, we went up and helped Logan and Morgan move...again. I thought I had written about that before, but I couldn't find it to link. Here's the deal: When they moved into their campus apartment in the married housing "village," it was right when they got back from their honeymoon in June. We went up there and helped lug all of their stuff up to the 2nd floor. And we were happy to do it. A couple of weeks later, we went BACK up there and hauled a washer and dryer up those stairs, so they wouldn't have to go to the laundromat, and we were happy to do it. BUT THEN, the "powers that be" at their university said that they were renovating all first floor apartments, in order to make them handicapped accessible. And that even if you lived on the 2nd floor, you would have to move out because they would need to shut off the electricity to the building to do the construction. Logan and Morgan were not happy. So that's why we had to go BACK up there and move all of their things out of their 2nd story apartment...and into a new apartment (still in the "village"). And we were happy to do it, but we were not happy ABOUT it.
All of the things we moved from their first apartment to their new apartment...was stuff that they had gotten for wedding gifts just a few months ago. Logan and Morgan said that it was just so frustrating to be given this news after they had worked so hard to make their place a home. If they had known they would have to move in a couple of months, they would've just brought the bare bones necessities and waited until they were relocated to do all of the "homey" things.
Logan lived in a house with two other guys during his Senior year of college. And, being a typical boy, he still had not moved all of his stuff out of his room at the house. While we had the truck and trailer, we decided to go over there and get everything of Logan's out of that house. LIKE WE HAD ASKED LOGAN TO DO BEFORE THE WEDDING.
And, it's fine. And it's done. But Logan and Morgan kept bringing us stuff from that house saying, "we thought Clark might like this in his dorm room." This lamp, that picture, the TV stand.
Ummm...excuse me, but Clark is not going to college. Like, EVER. He is going to stay home with me, because he's my baby and babies don't go to college.
And I shall call him Squishy and he shall be mine and he shall be my Squishy.
Thank you, Dory.
Anyway, it seems like I'm going to be out-voted on the college thing, so we have taken him on a couple of campus visits.
Jim took him on the first visit to a small, private college in the NW part of our state. It was one that Clark chose and one we never would've considered. Clark was excited, because he had done it all on his own. And he was excited because he was with his Dad and had a good time. Jim enjoyed it because it gave him the opportunity to see Clark in a setting outside of home. He was impressed with Clark's "people skills" when talking with professors, and he was impressed with how easily Clark talked with his peers...how he found a common interest with them, and then wound the conversation around to asking about their personal relationship with Jesus. Pretty bold for an 18 year old kid that can be kind of annoying around here at times.
I'm kidding.
It's just that sometimes we see the mess and the forgetfulness and the cluttered car and the SIX...count 'em, SIX...pairs of shoes strewn all over the living room, kitchen and up the stairs. And sometimes we forget that we are ALL works in progress, and God isn't finished with any of us yet.
On Saturday, we went on a college visit to the University of Central Arkansas here in our town. We have 3 colleges here: UCA, and two private colleges. It's not what I envision for Clark at this point...maybe later, for grad school...but the campus is just beautiful. And BIG. Nearly 12,000 students go there.
We went on a tour with a group, and I became BFF with one of our tour guides. I had to walk at the front of the group because #1...I was trying to show Clark that I have an open mind about UCA, and one way to do that is to act very enthusiastic and interested; and #2...let's face it...I had to have an audience. I was being my usual self...trying not to embarrass Clark, but also using some well-timed, under-my-breath zingers to lighten the mood.
I was mainly cracking myself up...because, let's face it...we've been there, done that. You can pick out the "first-timer" college parents from the ones who have been down this road before. We are older, for sure...and wiser. We are checking things out with a realistic eye, and reading between the lines. "Free this" and "free that" sounds really good, but we know it's included in tuition...which is NOT free. Unless you have a full-ride. Which, Clark might have, at this school...but that little caveat was not mentioned. We are also way more relaxed about things because we've seen things work out for kids despite the odds...and we've seen things not work when circumstances are perfect.
And, you know, we are praying about all of it. Maybe GOD wants him there, whether we "see" it for Clark or not. And it's close...5 minutes away. If you've read my blog for any length of time, you know I am all over that!
Later this week, we are going on a college visit to Ouachita Baptist University. This is where I went for my first two years of college and I just loved it (I transferred to Henderson State University, right across the street, after Jim and I got married...and we both graduated from there). Our daughter, Holly, spent her 4 years at OBU and loved every minute of it. I can just see Clark there, but we are trying not to influence him in any way.
But, GO TIGERS.
I'm so excited for this visit.
We are just praying that GOD will make His will crystal clear.
"For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven." Ecclesiastes 3:1
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