Wednesday, April 13, 2016

Quotes from the Beach Trip

So, if you have kids...aren't they sweet?

I mean, especially when they're little. E'erbody say, "awwwww..." 

And doesn't your heart just about explode when you look at them...when you think of how you would move heaven and earth for them...and how you would sacrifice your time, energy, finances...and even your very life...all for them?

Well, I'm here to tell you, there will come a point when your child...the one you spent over 20 hours in labor before having to get prison scars to extract them out of your body...that sweet blessing...will, one day, make fun of you. TO YOUR FACE.

Oh, it starts when they are eye-roll, an exasperated sigh. When they are a little older, they will make fun of you behind their their friends. They're really not that good at hiding things, yet, and so you know they do this. Eventually, they will just do it right to your face. Like, you'll say something really wise and profound...maybe repeating something your own parents said to you when you were young (because you just want to "help" your kids by giving them unwanted advice, just like your parents "helped" you)...and your kids will look at you like that was the absolute dumbest thing they've ever heard in their lives. Hopefully, like it is in our case, this is all done in good-natured and mostly respectful fun.

But there's another thing that happened with our kids as they got older: they ganged up on us.

While nothing makes me happier than seeing how much my kids genuinely love hanging out with each other, when they are together...and when they get on a roll...remembering some of the things Jim and I have said and done...they take no prisoners.

There's no time this is more apparent than when we are on vacation. Every time we go somewhere as a family, they keep a running list of quotes from on the trip...and then bring them up for eternity.

Most of the quotes are from Joshua, because he is just so funny...and from Jim. Jim is Type A+. Like, Type A on steroids. So, throwing him on a trip with 6 or 8 "go-with-the-flow" people? Well, it's the perfect storm.

JIM: "Well, I don't know if we can fit another thing in the car." [said as we packed the car at our house].

JIM: "We'd better hope Holly only has 1 bag..." [said as we drove over to pick up Holly].

JIM [When Holly came out with not one, but THREE bags...and Frank-the-giant-pregnancy-pillow wrapped around her, and we all laughed our heads off for a good 6 minutes]: "it's funny until you can't get it in the car!"

JIM [to me when I asked whether I should turn left or right]: "Well, you COULD go left...but you'd end up in the middle of the Mississippi River." (I mean, seriously?)

JIM [right before downing 3 large spoonfuls of a Wendy's Frosty]: "I'll get one for Holly, but I don't need one...I've got cookies in the car."

When the phone charger in the car wasn't working:
HOLLY: "the phone charger isn't working."
ME: "the phone charger isn't working."
CLARK: "the phone charger isn't working."
JIM (LOUD EXASPERATED SIGH): "give me the charger (plugs in his phone) (SURPRISED VOICE) "Well, THE PHONE CHARGER ISN'T WORKING."

JOSHUA [with his proud face on]: "I've got a surprise for Holly...a DVD we can watch together. It's her childhood favorite."
HOLLY (groan): "ohhh it Black Beauty?"

[Stopping at a gas station to potty]
JIM: "Joshua, are you getting out?"
JOSHUA: "We are family...we all get out."

[As we pulled into Gulf Shores]
JIM: "where'd we rent our condo from?"
ME: "Meyer."
JIM: "we always rent from them.
ME: "no, we don't."
JIM: "yes, we DO."
ME: [silence] [I should get brownie points for this]
*pulling up to Meyer to get the condo key*
JIM: "oooooo...we've never rented from here before."
ME: [slow blink]

And this:
JIM TO ME: "For some reason, and I don't know why...I want to think you're right."

See? Good-natured fun! (grrrr...)

"Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person." Colossians 4:6

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