Exaggerations and Haircuts

When I was in about the 2nd grade and my sister, Leanne, was in Kindergarten, we lived in Virginia. My Dad was in Vietnam, and my Mom had moved "home" to be closer to her family. Before my Dad left, he and my Mom had found a little house for our family. It was right across from the elementary school we would attend. My Mom would walk us across the street every morning before school, and I'm assuming she met us after-school and helped us cross the street...altho, I don't know.

I don't remember much about that house, except I think it had a basement...and the backyard had red, clay dirt. There were old bricks in the backyard and whenever we would turn them over, there would be rolly-pollys under them.

I remember my parents had bought a new stay-wag before my Dad left for Vietnam. We did not have a garage. Did people not have garages as much back in the day? I don't know. But there was this one day when the weather person predicted a bad storm...they said it might have large hail. My Mom, wanting to protect the new car, put our nap mats from school on the hood and roof of the car.

But that day? It didn't storm. It was hot as blue-blazes, but it did not storm. You know what did happen? It was so hot that the color off the nap mats melted onto the hood and roof of the new car. Yeah. My Mom was SO upset, and she took the mats off.

It hailed the next day.

So now, not only did the tan-colored car now have a green film all over it...it had large dents in it from the hail.

And now I totally forgot where I was going with this post.

Oh, yeah. Exaggerations and haircuts.

One day when I was in the 2nd grade and Leanne was in Kindergarten...my Mom took us to get our hair trimmed. I think it's key to know that she took us to the BEAUTY SALON AT THE JC PENNEY'S in Charlottesville, Virginia.

Leanne and I had long hair. Like, past shoulder length and more mid-back length. We wore it straight, parted on the side...every single day.

At the hair appointment, I went first and I think it went okay. I went back out to the waiting room to wait on Leanne with my Mom. My Mom was reading a magazine, and I was being a little kid and walking all over the place. I could see the girl cutting Leanne's hair if I stood in a certain place over by the door. By the time I noticed what was going on, Leanne's hair was getting SHORT. I kept telling my Mom, "her hair is getting short...it's shorter than mine...it's up to her shoulders...it's up to her neck...IT'S OVER HER EARS." Every time, my Mom would say, "mmmmm..." and NEVER LOOK UP FROM HER MAGAZINE.

This was a modern day version of the little boy calling "wolf."

When Leanne came out, she had a PIXIE HAIR-CUT. My Mom FREAKED OUT...and I sat there, smug with satisfaction. I told my Mom, "I TOLD YOU SHE WAS CUTTING IT SHORT."

My Mom wasn't having any of that. I'm pretty sure that I got in trouble for poppin' off my mouth.

Yeah...the girl cut Leanne's hair too short. I tell you about it. You ignore me...and now I'M in trouble. Story of my life.

She later said that she didn't pay any attention to what I was saying because I was KNOWN TO EXAGGERATE.

Whaaaat?

Who's exaggerating now, Mom...who's exaggerating now?

And, I guess it all worked out in the end. My Mom had a fit on the girl at the JC PENNEY BEAUTY SALON and ended up getting Leanne's hair buzz cut for free. Leanne looked precious in her pixie hair cut. In fact, my Mom had a picture of Leanne, with her short hair, directing her class play or musical or something...so that pixie hair-cut did nothing to diminish her self-confidence. Even at an early age, she was taking charge of things and running them AS THEY SHOULD BE RUN!

So, what have we learned?

--Virginia has red, clay dirt and rolly-pollys.
--The weather forecasters aren't always right.
--Garages are important.
--JC PENNEY BEAUTY SALONS
--There's exaggeration...and then there's short hair. Just sayin'.
--Saying "I told you so?" Not ever a good thing to say to your mom.

"Honor your father and mother..." Exodus 20:12