Because Jim has a little garden in the back corner of our yard. He loves growing things, and feeling like he's "living off the land."
If you can call a 1 inch carrot and a potato the size of a ping-pong ball "living off the land."
He does grow other things, tho, and quite well: tomatoes, jalapenos, broccoli, asparagus...one potato.
He started growing asparagus several years ago, because he saw how expensive it was at the grocery. It takes a while, and he doesn't get a whole, whole lot...but he loves it.
This year, he decided to grow broccoli. I don't know that he's ever grown broccoli before, but he's been watching it and caring for it. He came in the other day all mad, because something ate the head off of one of one of his broccoli plants during the night.
The next night...the same thing happened.
We have no idea what could be eating it. With Maggie, our geriatric, Black Lab, wanting to sleep in the garage at night, instead of on her bed on the back porch...it could be anything.
I suggested a bunny, but Jim said he didn't think a bunny could reach it. I said, "a squirrel? A bird? A raccoon? A coyote?" I don't know. But what I DO know, because Jim told me, is that it would most definitely NOT be a SNAKE.
Anyway, I'm chasing rabbits. Ooooo...maybe it was a RABBIT that ate Jim's broccoli!
Oh, wait. I said, "bunny." That's pretty much the same thing as a rabbit, because, really...how much bigger is a rabbit from a bunny? NOT.MUCH.
Unless you're in Australia, home of the giant bunnies.
Oh, wait. I'm thinking of a kangaroo.
There is a venomous snake in a MASON JAR on the table on our patio. EXCUSE ME FOR NOT THINKING STRAIGHT.
So, Jim casually mentioned he'd caught a snake in the backyard, and no one in here really batted an eye.
Clark asked, "what kind of snake is it?" Jim said, "I think it's a baby Copperhead." The kids started asking "where?" and "how big?" and "are you sure?" And that's how Marty was nearly trampled to death by her very own children, as they ran over her to get to the back door.
When I came to, I searched The Google under "Facts about Copperheads," and read that a mommy Copperhead can give birth to 7-10 babies.
With my recent post-wreck anxiety that I've written about, I DO NOT NEED THIS STRESS!
And I've pretty much convinced myself that one of them is going to somehow get into our sewer system, and swim through the pipes to my potty.
AND YOU BETTER BELIEVE THAT I LOOK EVERY TIME.
"Be well balanced, be vigilant and cautious at all times; for that enemy of yours, the devil, roams around like a lion roaring, seeking someone to seize upon and devour." 1 Peter 5:8