Everyone wants to raise strong boys, but you can receive mixed reactions when you talk about raising strong girls. People are either like, “YEAH! Girl power!” Or they’re like, “slow your roll, Norma Rae.”
Here’s the thing: we do need to raise strong girls.
And here’s the other thing: We ARE raising strong girls, and we ARE already strong.
We are strong enough to befriend the lonely, not worried about what others will say. I’m lookin’ at you, Lindsey Walker (Joshua's friend from K-12).
We are strong enough to encourage our friends, because we know that their successes don’t take away from ours.
We are strong enough to grow a life, birth a baby, and nourish them from our bodies. We’re also strong enough to love a child who was born from another, to raise them as equally as the ones who came from our bodies.
We are strong enough to take criticism: from family, friends, and even from strangers...who have opinions about everything in our lives.
We are strong enough to be in a marriage, without losing ourselves...and strong enough to go on alone, if we happen to lose our husbands.
We are strong enough to hold our tongues when we should...and sometimes when we shouldn’t. We are strong enough to speak our minds on a subject, to voice our opinions, to own our emotions.
Sometimes, we doubt ourselves, our abilities, our motives. We are still learning.
Not every woman or girl has to be a sign-holding activist, altho there may be times when we feel so strongly about a situation or a cause that that’s what we do. Sometimes bringing awareness to a situation brings change.
But I want to gently offer this for consideration: there are strong women who work quietly every day in their homes...raising their children (or other peoples’ children), and stretching their budgets.
Some strong women are caring for their elderly parents.
A strong woman close to my heart has added “caregiver” to her role as a wife, spending her days driving to and from a facility...where she daily visits, supports, and encourages her husband; daily laying down her life, her will, her time, her preferences, and her dreams...for him; daily living “in sickness and in health.”
One of the strongest women I know lives with great challenges, parenting two daughters who have delicate and complex medical needs every day. EVERY DAY, y’all.
Another strong woman I know advocates fiercely for the children in foster care in our state.
Another strong woman I know is fighting cancer, and not for the first time...and is boldly committed to serving God “all the way to the gates.”
There are strong women in the workplace...fighting against stereotypes and expectations, and shattering those glass ceilings.
There are strong women who are single-handedly taking care of their families, by choice or because of loss or circumstances.
There are strong women who teach our children in school every day. There are strong women who care for us and our loved ones in the hospital; strong women who work at Kroger, your bank, the post office; strong women who serve and protect our country.
I want to suggest that we stop thinking women are “strong” only if they act or look a certain way, or believe a certain way, or have a certain profession, or belong to a certain political party.
Strong women support other women instead of tearing them down.
And here’s another thought: I’m confused as to why one gender needs to be superior to the other. And why we feel it’s necessary to put down one gender...in order to raise the other?
Why can’t we celebrate BOTH?
What I wanted, what I still want, was to raise a strong girl, of course. But also to raise strong BOYS...who would grow into strong men: men strong in faith, compassion, and character; who respect authority, and obey their parents; who love Jesus; who value the role of a husband and father; who partner with their wives to love God and each other, who teach their children, with words and by example, about Jesus; who serve God, their wives, their families, their church, and others; who see worth in a person, no matter their age, skin color, or if they are differently-abled; who respect the thoughts and opinions of women; who believe that women are capable, intelligent, and valuable; who cheer on and support the women in their lives, and encourage them to be all God has created them to be.
I have a girl and 3 boys.
This time, next year...Lord willing...our family will look much different, as we add two precious, new grandbabies to the sweet one we already have. My desire and my prayer is the same for all of our kids and grandkids, no matter their gender: simply put, to love God, and love others; to serve God, and serve others; and to share God...WITH others.
And for each one to tend carefully to their own spiritual life. Because, to borrow this quote, “you cannot impart what you do not possess.”
Let’s do better.
STRONG GIRLS. STRONG BOYS. STRONG HUMANS.
"I have no greater joy than this: to hear that my children are walking in truth." 3 John 1:4
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