The Gift of Time

So here’s how it usually goes down when you see someone you know: “hey, how are you?” “I’m good...you?” Usually we don’t even stop walking. 

Amiright? 

Well, here’s how it went down last month: person walks into the bakery, sees me and Joshua, and says to Joshua, “hey...I know YOU!” 

Joshua: “you do?” 

Person: “yes! I read about you all the time on your mom’s Facebook and Instagram. You’re kind of famous!” 

Joshua:  "I am!"

And then, she gave him (and me) the biggest gift...SHE SAT DOWN. 

She sat down at the table with him, and visited with him while I ordered. 

She sat with him like she had all the time in the world JUST FOR HIM...even tho I know she didn’t. 

We’re all busy, right? 

It was the best thing ever, and such a great reminder that the gift of your time...the gift of being interested in someone...the gift of listening to what they have to say...is a gift that will be remembered forever. 

“And the King will answer them, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of Mine, you did for Me.’" Matthew 25:40

On the Other Side of the Unknown...He is There

When we headed home from Tulsa a couple of weeks ago, my mind was racing in a hundred different ways, trying to figure out things for my Dad...wondering what is the next step for him. 

But what if we can’t see the next step? 

What then? 

Well, we trust God to show us. 

The Bible tells us that God’s Word is “a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path.” 

He will light our way...but He doesn’t always light up the WHOLE way from the very beginning. 

A flashlight will light your path, when you’re on a trail, but it doesn’t light up the WHOLE path all at once. It doesn’t show you what’s around the corner, or how steep the hill is, or if there are things ahead that might trip you up. 

No, it lights your next step...and you take it..and then it lights the step after that. 

Running ahead of God can cause you to stumble. You can go the wrong way. You can get lost in the dark. Just like running ahead of the light on a trail can cause you to stumble, get hurt, or get lost. 

Today, we are unsure of the path before us, but we are holding tight to the hand of the One who holds our future. 

On the other side of the unknown...He is there.

"When I am filled with cares, Your comfort brings me joy." Psalm 94:19

Sanctity of Life: 2019

I think that, as Christians, when it comes to Sanctity of Life, we spend a lot of talking about all of the babies whose lives are intentionally ended before birth. 

And we should, because it’s heartbreaking on so many levels. 

This is a subject close to my heart, not only because I’m a mom. But also because, over 25 years ago, a young woman with an unplanned pregnancy chose life...and our family has been profoundly blessed by her decision. 

And because that one choice will impact my family for generations to come. 

But I’d like to gently suggest that pro-life goes way beyond abortion...to the ones born into situations that are unhealthy or unsafe; to the orphan; to the abandoned; to the abused and neglected; to the children and teens in foster care; to children and teenagers languishing in institutions all over the world...deemed unlovable and unwanted...because of genetic or chromosomal conditions; to the chronically ill, mentally ill, terminally ill; to our elderly...once vibrant, independent, and healthy...now completely dependent on others for their care. 

How “pro-life” are we? 

My mind goes to a precious toddler, born into a situation most of us cannot comprehend. Hospitalized, in a coma...her body broken by abuse. I think of the day my friend was made aware of her case...how she made her way to the hospital, how she held that tiny body, and promised her that her death would not be in vain. 

How did we fail this child? Did we judge her situation? Her family? Did we see something we didn’t report? Did we suspect something, but just didn’t want to get involved? 

However wrong, reckless, dangerous, neglectful, or apathetic some parents are...there are the children, who have done nothing wrong, and they need us to fight for them. 

If we plead with pregnant women to choose life, and then they do...then what? 

How do we help them...and how do we help their babies? 

There are some 1300 churches like mine in our state. If even half of them had one family who would adopt one child out of foster care...there would be no waiting children in our state. 

Not everyone is called to add a child to their family this way, but we are ALL called to care for and defend the fatherless. 

We can support a family financially, offer to babysit, buy groceries, make a meal, purchase clothing or school supplies, donate to an adoption fund. 

On a personal level, my life has been blessed by adoption. 

The day program Joshua attends includes FRIENDS who have a variety of challenges and abilities. Some went through a typical school...some did not. Each week, I watch the Staff think wayyy outside the box for ways to include each FRIEND in each activity or experience, to the best of their abilities. And I wonder how many times, in life, these precious ones were overlooked and not included, simply because no one saw the need. Or because it was too hard. Or because they didn’t think it mattered. I’m so thankful for a place where these FRIENDS can thrive, for people who value LIFE...and are able and willing to see beyond a disability. #prolifeforalllife 

The place where my Dad is staying for rehab has room after room of elderly people who are alone. Forgotten by their families...or a great distance away from their families...or maybe they have outlived their families. I don’t know. I’m not judging anyone’s decision, because most people do the best they can with the resources they have available. What I DO know, is that one night, after Clara had gone home, my Dad woke up very distraught. They said they could hear my normally soft-spoken Dad...all the way down at the nurse’s station. He was screaming her name over and over. One of the aides went down to check on him. When she saw his distress, she had compassion for him. And even though it wasn’t technically her job, this most unlikely girl, pulled up a chair, and held his hand until he went to sleep. 

Oh, may God give us eyes to see the hurt around us, hearts to share His amazing grace and forgiveness...and arms to link with others, showing them they are not alone. 

You know, sometimes, in life, we make the wrong choices. Sometimes we know better, and we do it anyway. But sometimes we just don’t know. Sometimes we feel desperate...backed into a corner, with no other solution in sight. 

And sometimes, it’s a choice made by others that affects us for the rest of our lives. 

We are not too messed up for Jesus. 

He heals, He forgives, He saves. 

The ground is level at the foot of the cross...Jesus will meet us there.

"Your eyes saw me when I was formless; all my days were written in Your book and planned before a single one of them began." Psalm 139:16

Joshua and the Wristband

Our Daily Fred: If you’ve followed us for a while, you are familiar with the wristband debacle of 2013. 

Or maybe it was 2011. 

I can’t remember. 

For the past 8 years, or so, we’ve taken a family trip to the beach over Spring Break. We used to go in the summer, but then the younger boys started having summer football practices...so we started going in the Spring. 

The place we stay gives everyone wristbands, and you’re supposed to wear them while you’re on the property...or on the beach. You know, to identify you as someone who is renting a condo on their property. 

Every year, I think, “this will be the year that it’s not a *thing* with our #1 child...” and, every year, I’m wrong. 

And, every year, I’m baffled. 

Baffled at how an adult human-being absolutely cannot abide an innocent strip of plastic-y-vinyl-y material that never hurt anybody...hanging loosely on their wrist. 

Baffled at how, in a family of, say, 10 or so people, 9 people can slap on the wristband without a thought...but that 1 person sees the wristband as a declaration of war. 

We don’t put it on him too tight. We make it a point to be careful with this, so that it doesn’t “choke” his arm. And then we lull ourselves into thinking things are okay, until at dinner when someone notices, and asks, “where’s your wristband?” 

Then we get a defiant glare, along with a lot of mumbling. 

Usually, by the time we are all headed down to the beach the next morning, we’ve forgotten about it...until we notice the incredibly thin and stretched out band is back on his wrist, barely hanging on. We all wonder when the stretching-out-of-it happens, because it’s never done in our presence. Does he stay up all night? What? 

This year, I walked into our condo bedroom, to find a big bowl of chaos going on. He’d lost the wristband. 

LOST.IT. 

I was so frustrated. He.is.32.years.old and it.is.just.not.that.hard.to.wear.the.stinkin.band. But I helped him look through the room, the bathroom, his bed, THE TRASH. I even looked through the clothes in the dryer. No wristband. 

Fortunately, the nice people at the place had given us an extra one. 

I put this one on him a little tighter. Don’t worry, it still wasn’t even remotely touching his wrist. 

Later than evening, I found that band on the dresser...snapped in two. 

What.in.the.world? 

UGHHHHH. 

This past Sunday, Joshua received the sweetest gift from sweet Mrs. Renee Bond: chocolate chip cookies, and prayer bracelets for her husband. 

Joshua’s been doling those cookies out like he’s Oprah...”YOU get a cookie...and YOU get a cookie...” 

And as he slipped one of those prayer bracelets on, he smiled real big, and said, “now THIS is a band I will wear!” 

We are continuing to pray for you, Bro. David! Thank you, Mrs. Renee!

"Pray in the Spirit at all times and on every occasion. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all believers everywhere." Ephesians 6:18

KON-MARI, Y'all

So it seems nearly everyone I know is watching the tiny tidy lady show, and throwing out everything they own. 

If you’re one of the 2 people who haven’t heard of this show, it’s this sweet lady who helps people cleanse their homes and closets of all the unnecessary things. 

You’re supposed to clear everything out of your closet, and, before you bring anything back in, you hold up each item, and ask yourself it it brings you joy. If it doesn’t, you toss (or donate) it...but not before thanking it for it’s service. 

I want to thank God, who has blessed us far more than we deserve. And Jim’s parents, for helping us get through college...which enabled us to get jobs...which, helps us buy (borrow, share) the things we need, including clothes. 

But whatev. 

I’m all about a spirit of generosity. 

So thank you, black leggings, for holding things in over Thanksgiving and Christmas...and for stretching beyond the bounds of spandex and thread. Thank you for being my “go to” for all the tunics, and for staying smooth when I stuffed you into my FUGG (fake Ugg) boots. 

You were like pants to me. 😢 

Now that there’s a hole in you, I can no long wear you out in public. I still love you, but this is good-bye.” 😭 

And just so all y’all know, the only clothes that bring me joy (besides the velvet sequined leggings I wore on NYE) are my 7 pairs of flannel pajammies...and so I will now be wearing them everywhere I go until the first of May. 

Or mid-April, if it gets too hot. 

"And give thanks for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ." Ephesians 5:20

Hello Blog, My Old Friend...I've Come to Write on You Again...

Remember that time I had a blog and I updated on it regularly, like a journal, so my kids/grandkids would be able to read about our family after I'm gone?

Remember that year when Mom fell off the face of the earth?

So much has happened during the last year and a half or so. I probably won't go back and recap it all...maybe I'll just wait til something comes up. I don't know.

But here we are in January, and so far it's awesome!

And, by "awesome," I mean it's quiet...calm...uneventful. Nothing like the past 6 months in our family...with an engagement, a wedding, the announcement of 2 more grandbabies coming, a job promotion, and two of ours finishing grad school. HALLELUJAH PRAISE THE LORD!

Right now, I'm content to just be.

To sit and think and (hopefully) write some things.

School started back here today, which affects me not at all, because my kids are grown...but I remember simultaneously hating this day, and also being kind of relieved at this day.

Anyone else?

I'm the crazy mom who loves having the kids home during the holidays, and during the summers. I love the chaos and the no schedule and the lazy days. But as much as I loved it, my kids did get restless...and it wasn't until after they were all back at school that I realized how nice it was to just have a minute to breathe.

Having the time to catch your breath, when you have a busy family, is so nice...and not underrated at all.

So this morning is quiet...and slow.

But it's still a Monday, so you best believe I made muffins for Joshua. I'm not a complete psycho.

We were supposed to have Rhodie today, but the census was down in the NICU, so Holly got canceled. Joshua has spent all morning up in his room...singing, dancing, working out, praying, reading the Bible, writing in his journal.

I've spent my morning doing all of that, too...except the working out part!

He came downstairs at lunch time...sniffing the air, and looking around. If we have the baby, we almost always go to Chick-Fil-A for lunch...because about 11:15, Rhodie will start yelling, "CHICK-EN! FRIES! KETSUP! AH-PUL JOOSE! ICY CREAM!"

Today, since we don't have him, I thought we could just eat something here. I said, "Joshua, you can eat Dad's leftover sub sandwich that's in the frig." Joshua: [HUGE SIGH} "okay..."

He's not too good at hiding his disappointment.

He also made a "S'more" for his dessert, but he said he could only find half of one graham cracker...so he layered: 1/2 graham cracker, 1/2 Hershey bar...and he put 1/2 marshmallow on top. Then he microwaved it for, like, 2 seconds.

And I didn't say a word.

Teaching independence, one cold, hard S'more at a time.

What are your goals for January? I have some.

Do you have a word for this year? I think I do.

This morning, I'm feeling peaceful, thankful, encouraged, expectant.

HAHAHAHA...at first, I typed "expectorant." I'm not feeling expectorant at all. Thank goodness!

"...Who am I, O Sovereign LORD, and what is my family, that You have brought me this far?" 2 Samuel 7: 18